Autism and Relatives

The news that a little one in the family is developmentally challenged is usually met with a number of reactions. While all family members, even extended, can be encouraging in an ideal world, the unfortunate truth is that some may feel unhappy or let down.

Does a relative scold the autistic child often? Does he or she view your developmentally challenged child unjustly? Does this member of the family insist on treating your developmentally challenged child the same way he or she treats all the other children in your family, even when it is improper? These are indicators that this relative is not receptive to either your autistic child or the situation.

This may often be the case when discovering a child is autistic, so as a parent or guardian, be aware and prepared for this to happen. Often, standoffish family members simply do not comprehend what autism is or what it means for your child and your immediate family. Though many see autism as a form of mental retardation, many autistic children and adults are highly intelligent; they are just unable to communicate this in the same ways that others would.

Try explaining what autism means to this family member, and have him or her spend some time with you and your developmentally challenged child. Allow them to see the effects of autism and the techniques you can use to cope. If the family member continues to be unsupportive or refuses your explanation, question why this member of the family is so unreceptive to the situation. Are they scared of harming the child? Are they stressed about the increased responsibility when spending time with the child? Maybe they feel guilty or are embarrassed.

Provided you can figure out why a family member is unreceptive, you can better deal with the concern and hopefully help them overcome their original beliefs. Possibly no amount of discussing or spending time together will help this relative get over their prejudice. If this person has stubbornly made up his or her mind, you'll never be able to show him or her how wonderful your son or daughter is - autism and all.

If this is the case, eliminating this individual from your life may be tricky, but it will also rid you and your child of their negative energy and personality. In this developing situation, you need the strongest positive support available. Keep in mind that other family members have been encouraging; that your children are adjusting well and are a source of strength for you. Strengthen your support network by participating in guardian support groups for autistic children. And remember that you can surround yourself with those who do accept and love your child - family or not.